Day Fourteen

Had a really great day. Jon and I were just discussing tonight that it's only been two weeks on the program and we're pretty settled into this new change of eating habits. Though I can be tempted by things throughout the day, I really don't desire to go back to eating whatever I want whenever I want.

As I predicted, the "inner work" is proving much more challenging than the physical weight loss and lifestyle changes. My insecurities run deep. Each day I have a moment of struggle (or two) as I come to terms with my body and who I really am. It comes in waves of various feelings...anger, sadness, confusion. It can be triggered by a variety of things too. But I do realize I have a choice in this matter. I've chosen to follow a weight loss plan, I've chosen to be more honest in my life, and I can choose to not let insecurities rule me. But that doesn't make it any easier to face them.

We took our dinner to the beach again, stayed to watch the sunset. We ate and laughed, I chased Isaiah around as he charmed all the people there, his adoring fans. Sitting quietly, watching the sun go down with my two guys, everything felt in perfect alignment. Every moment can't be that way, but I wouldn't want it to be. Because when days like this do come along, they wouldn't be as special.

Will be weighing in tomorrow morning. Still odd to feel excited about something like that.